Today was the turning point between me just being bored and wanted to shoot myself in the head just for something to do. I need a job less for the money and more to keep myself busy. I hate being bored and often resort to watching law and order and drinking a lot of tea. This can be entertaining, but after nearly 3 weeks of sitting on my ass I need SOMETHING. Since I have been working so hard on the job search and have a number of resumes pending I decided today would be the day that I would find a hobby. I have a desire to make something, but everything I think of I find a reason why not to do it. I am tired of sitting in front of the computer so that disposes of many hobbies. Also, hobbies typically take a fair amount of money, especially when just starting out, and that is something I dont have right now. So I went through the litany of ideas, photography, painting, drawing, building, constructing, and none of them struck my fancy. Well I did drag out my drawing board and tried drawing Elisabet which failed somewhat miserably. It also is a pain not having anyone to do anything with. Nicole and Ev have school and then homework at night and Kev and Pat simply drink all the time which I am not too keen on.
I want to build a deck or a birdhouse or something. I wish I had my tools. I am not here fishing for idea, I am just venting about my frustration in not finding anything to do. I just want something to show for my time sitting around. Maybe I will learn to crochet. I JUST WANT TO BE PRODUCTIVE!!!!! It is the only thing that will keep my mind off Elisabet.
At the very least Lost is on tonight.
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